Ready. Set. Grow! Blog

Turning Reading Moments into Learning Moments

Nov 8th, 10 / 0 Comments

By Double Duty Mama

Let’s face it – there’s just not enough time in the day to get everything done when you’re a working parent. I love to cut corners anywhere I can. So, when I figured out that I could use story times to teach other lessons, I was thrilled.

It was actually my older son who brought this possibility to my attention when, after a reading of “Green Eggs and Ham,” he turned to me and said: “He really should have tried something new before saying he didn’t like it.” It was like a light bulb went on over my head. “Yes,” I replied. “Like when you say you don’t like celery, but you’ve never tried it…” Well, you see where I’m going with this.

Soon, I realized that a lot of our favorite books, classics and new reads alike, offered subtle lessons that easily lead to a couple minutes of discussion when the last page was turned. Here, I offer you my own list of great books that teach great lessons:

“The Tortoise and the Hare” We all know that the hare could’ve won the race if he wasn’t so lazy and conceited. I like to focus on the turtle. He may not be the swiftest, but his dedication earned him a great victory.
“The Little Engine that Could” This tale of the tiny train engine who brought the load of toys and treats over the mountain, even when he thought he couldn’t, resonates with my little train-loving boys. But it’s also fun to remind them about the train every time they whine, “I caaaaannnn’t.” I just say back: “I think I can, I think I can….”
“No Matter What” When I get angry with my boys, they sometimes ask, “Do you still love me?” This book, about a large wolf who loves her small wolf, even when he’s grumpy, is a great reminder to my kids that there is nothing they can do that will make me love them any less.
“Purplicious” Poor Pinkalicious gets the blues when the all the kids make fun of her for loving pink so much … until she meets another girl who tells her how powerful it is because, without pink, there would be no purple. My boys don’t even care that the color is “pink,” they know from this sweet book that it’s not nice to make fun of anybody about what they like, because everybody is different.
“The Boy Who Cried Wolf” OK, it may be cliché, but I swear my younger son learned lessons about lying from the shepherd boy who tried to spice up his life with false cries of “Wolf!” If you lie, I told him, no one will ever believe you, like the shepherd boy. Now, he believes me.
“The Gulps” The Gulps family is fat. So fat, their American Dreamliner RV won’t go any further. When they get stranded on a farm, they learn that fresh-from-the-garden meals and outdoor work is good for the body. I’ll take any chance I get to remind my boys about the importance of eating right and exercise, and the Gulps give me lots of opportunities.
“The Parrot Tico Tango” This book’s colorful illustrations and catchy rhyme scheme is a great attention grabber. But the lesson lies with the kleptomaniac parrot who finds, after he steals all his rainforest friends’ fruit, that it’s not right to take from others. When we read this book, my younger son likes to point out how wrong the bird is and how it’s better to share.
“The Lost Duckling” What scares a little kid more than the idea of being lost? When the little duckling doesn’t listen to his mom and stays behind at the pond, he is threatened by the fox and feels all alone. There are several versions of this classic tale in print, each sure to make any kid think twice before wandering away.

Parenting, Reading

How to Make a Homemade Book

Oct 27th, 10 / 0 Comments

One of the best and most affordable ways to build your child’s love of reading is to let them tell their own story with a homemade book. This activity builds creativity and imagination, and has an almost limitless realm of possibilities. Family photos, coloring pages, stickers, recipes and the alphabet are all great themes to inspire your child. They even make great gifts from your child to their loved ones. To get started, follow our step-by-step process to get. Choose from any of the ideas above, or create your own story.

Here’s what you’ll need:

Paper
Magazines
Glue
Stapler or Hole Punch and Ribbon
Scissors

1. Ask your children questions about the pictures and create the story together.

2. Once you have your story, flip through family photos or cut out pictures from magazines or newspapers to relate to your story idea. (If your child is old enough, have them draw their own pictures directly onto the paper.)

2. Paste the pictures onto brightly colored construction paper. Make sure you leave enough room on the page to write your story.

3. You can help your little ones by writing the story out onto the paper. With your older children, let them practice writing some of the words themselves.

4. Once all the glue has dried, put the pages of the book in the proper order.

5. Staple the edges of your pages together, or punch holes in the folded edge of the book and tie together with yarn or ribbon.

6. Make a cover with the title of your story and your child’s name as the author.

7. Display proudly and read often!

Just for Fun, Parenting, Reading

Patience, Perserverance and a Nipple Shield

Oct 19th, 10 / 0 Comments

by Double Duty Mama

A few weeks ago, my neighbors had their first baby. A couple weeks later, I came by to exchange scones for a dose of New Baby Smell. When I settled down on the couch, fresh baby dozing in my arms, I looked at the new mom and asked, “How are you?”

She hesitated a moment. I remember pausing in a similar way before answering such questions. You want to be a good hostess and not make anyone feel uncomfortable … but that means lying. Because, let’s face it, being a new mom is the strangest, toughest thing ever. You’re sleep-deprived. You’re unsure if you’re doing anything right. And you had no idea what a difficult and time-consuming process breastfeeding is.

I guess she trusted me – maybe because I seemingly survived two bouts of New Parenthood – to tell me the truth. “It’s hard,” she stated. The baby won’t latch on to her nipples, and her entire life is consumed by an endless cycle of pumping milk, feeding the baby and washing bottles and pumping accessories. She had gone to a lactation consultant, and tried a silicone nipple shield to see if that would help, but it didn’t.

I nodded, remembering those difficult first weeks of breastfeeding. Looking back, I told her, I still don’t know how I stuck to it. But some things, you just decide, are important enough to you to keep you going. What I also learned, though, is that you have to do what’s right for you and your family – and shut out the outsiders who insist that you do what they think is right.

Take the nipple shield, for instance. After my first son was born, it was clear to me that breastfeeding was not going to be one of those simple, lovely experiences you see on television with the newborn nestled to the boob moments after birth. We tried that, but he could care less about it. We tried again a couple hours later, but without luck. A few hours later, the crying began. But no matter how hungry he seemed and how much he wailed, I couldn’t get him to latch.

Over the next few days, the only way I was able to breastfeed my child was with the help of at least one, if not two, other people. Someone held the baby, someone squeezed my breast, someone else shoved his head into my chest. By the time we left the hospital, I had no confidence, but my cup runneth over with fear and stress.

The next day, we visited a lactation consultant. Normally modest, I shocked my husband by walking into her office, pulling off my shirt and pointing to my swollen breasts: “Make them work. Please!” I demanded. I stood there, crying, holding my crying son, in front of a stranger. But I didn’t care.

Despite everything I read about such things as “crutches” and “nipple confusion,” she recommended we try a nipple shield. It would slow down my fast, sharp milk flow that was choking my son and solve an inverted nipple problem. She told me to use it for the first few minutes until the baby got a sucking rhythm, then remove it and put him back on the breast. That flimsy $6 gadget, and her advice, saved us.

When I told my neighbor this story, I could see she felt relief in learning she wasn’t alone. I gently encouraged her to keep trying, reminding her how quickly these little guys change from day-to-day. A week can make a big difference in her daughter’s sucking abilities. And I praised her for continuing to pump and bottle feed, recognizing what a huge sacrifice she was making for her daughter’s well-being.

I continued nursing my boy until he was about a year old, and was so relieved when I didn’t have a similar experience when my second son was born. I look back at those first crazy weeks, though, and wonder how I ever continued. At 2 a.m., my husband and I would scour the Internet for the answers for our hungry, crying boy and only find advice like “have patience and perseverance.” I’ve never thought of myself as having either of those qualities. But, I guess, when it mattered the most, I dug in deep to pull them out. And, really, isn’t that what parenting is all about?

Breastfeeding

Sleeping

Oct 6th, 10 / 0 Comments

by Double Duty Mama

My babies didn’t sleep through the night until they were around 1-year-old. Meanwhile, some of my friends’ babies easily slept 10 to 12-hour stretches beginning around 10 weeks. This infuriated me. As a full-time working mother who needed her brain most the day, I felt desperate and sad. And tired. Oh, so tired.

I pressed my friends for every detail of their nights, hoping to find the secret, magic cure that would get me some much-needed shut eye. Did they sing before bed? What song? What book did you read? Are the window shades open or closed? When did the baby last eat? How much? Soon, every playdate turned into a Q&A.

While child development experts and pediatricians disagree about the various measures designed to get your kid to sleep, with some being more drastic than others, my husband and I opted to listen to the one voice we trusted: Our pediatrician. What she proposed seemed harsh, considering that, up until then, we responded every time the baby cried. But when my first child was four months old, she gave us a plan. And we stuck to that plan, never wavering despite the screams and the cries because WE JUST NEEDED SOME SLEEP.

Our pediatrician gave us sleep training guidelines that pulled bits and pieces from some of the popular, controversial methods we had seen, like those made into books by Dr. Richard Ferber and “Baby Whisperer” Tracy Hogg. Our doctor’s approach was simple:

•   Establish a bedtime routine that involved a bottle or nursing, reading out loud, maybe some singing and, of course, cuddles.
•   Put the baby to bed drowsy, but awake.
•   Say good-night, and leave the room.
•   When the crying starts, go in and check on the baby. Give him a pat, tell him he’s okay, but don’t pick him up. Leave the room.
•   As the crying persists, stretch out the intervals you visit him. Wait five minutes, then 10, then 15…. Don’t spend more than a minute or so, and never pick him up.

The idea behind this, and all the sleep training methods, is that you’re teaching babies to soothe themselves to sleep. Once they know how to get themselves to sleep, they will, theoretically, continue doing so through the night.

How did it go?

Well, that first night, this went on for about 40 minutes. When I say “went on,” I mean my baby boy SCREAMED consistently and horribly during that time. I left the house, went behind the garage, put my hands over my ears and cried – leaving my husband to do all the dirty work. The next night, he was asleep in less than 20 minutes. On the third night, he cried for about five minutes. Soon, most bedtimes were met with a minute or two of whimpering before he was out. (Just so you know, we enthusiastically employed the same method with my second son with even quicker success).

Neither child miraculously slept through the night right away. Those first few months, we were lucky to eek five or six hours out of them. That was frustrating, but it was better than only two or three hours of sleep, and I loved how easy and enjoyable bedtime became.

As the years went on, my boys soon became champion sleepers. Meanwhile, some of my friends whose babies were little angels all night found themselves dealing with demon toddlers who defied bedtime or refused to stay in their rooms at night. While they were marching their preschoolers back to their own rooms 30 or 40 times a night, my family was tucked away nicely, in their own beds, sleeping 11 straight, uneventful hours. Our bedtime routine, too, is still with us. Every night, we read a couple books, sing some songs and snuggle together. It signals that the day is coming to an end, helps the kids relax and unwind and, we all agree, is one of the best times of the day.

Parenting

Don’t Bite Me Lil’ Kim

Sep 30th, 10 / 0 Comments

by Auntie Em

Kimberly is a child who——only when her mother is not around—- we call “Lil ‘Kim” for all the wrong reasons. Have you ever had to watch a child bite her mother? It isn’t pretty.

What’s even worse is when you are afraid you may be next and Lil’ Kim’s mom distracts you: “My toddler is a biter. She bites when she’s excited, when she’s angry, and when she doesn’t get her way. Should I bite her back?”

As much I wanted to, I could not say go for it.

Without a doubt, biting is the behavior that parents dread most. Not surprisingly, biters are often excluded from daycare or playgroups.

When your toddler sinks her teeth into your — or even worse, another person’s — flesh, the “bite her back” argument may seem like a logical way to stop her biting. Don’t do that, it’s wrongheaded.

Teeth are natural weapons for all young mammals, so your child’s first instinct is to use them when she feels threatened or needs something. She doesn’t truly understand that biting is forbidden, let alone “wrong.” So when she bites, even if she does it gently and playfully, immediately and clearly convey to her that biting isn’t acceptable.

If her “kisses” turn into aggressive nibbles, remove her from your lap with a firm “no biting.” She’s still too young for lengthy explanations about why biting is bad; it’s enough at this point to simply tell her that she must not bite under any circumstances.

Make sure, too, that you don’t inadvertently reward your toddler for biting. Of course, teeth marks get your attention, but don’t pick her up — even if it’s to reprimand her. If your child bites another child, focus your attention on the injured party rather than on the biter — who may take even negative attention as reinforcement for doing it again.

While you need to firmly tell your child that biting isn’t okay, actually punishing her for the behavior isn’t very effective at getting her to stop. In fact, punitive measures may put an angry or over stimulated child right over the top. And though parents are often counseled to bite their child back “to show her how it feels,” this is as pointless as it is painful.

Young children do most of their social learning by following their parents’ example, so biting your child or otherwise inflicting pain on her sets a bad example. After all, how will she learn that biting is wrong if you do it?

Biting must be stopped, but you won’t stop it by stooping to your child’s level. Aggressive acts stop when adults stop them. So instantly remove your child’s teeth from her victim’s flesh, show concern for the child who’s been hurt, acknowledge both parties’ feelings, and, as your child’s verbal skills grow, help her learn to negotiate with words rather than aggression: “We don’t bite. Can you use your words to tell me what you need?”

Biting is a surefire means of communication. It gets attention. I guess “Lil’ Kim” was just trying to get her point across.

Behavior Issues, Parenting

Back-to-School Meals: Goodbye Lunchables, Hello Delicious!

Sep 24th, 10 / 4 Comments

by Momanista

By now, you and your child are just getting settled into the routines of fall, kicked off by being back in school. As I struggle to get my groove on with this, the negotiation between healthy, tasty and consumable-in-three-minutes—my son’s requirement out of the school lunch—has become a comedy routine in my kitchen.

I clock up the protein in the morning recess snack and lunch box, which my son’s doctor urges: it stabilizes blood sugar every two hours, sustaining attention span throughout the day. Then my son takes half the food out. Even still, it comes home only half eaten.

The excuses always boil down to time. My son explains it matter-of-factly, as if all parents should understand this reality: “I don’t want to waste anything but it takes too long to chew healthy stuff. I mean, almonds? It can’t be done in three minutes. It cuts into my play time. Kids hafta play, Mom. So here’s what you pack me: pizza, carrot sticks and fruit.”

Oh, I appear to be raising a lawyer. I suppose I can’t complain much as his demand list included a fruit and a vegetable, and God knows they need exercise, given P.E. has been drastically cut in schools.

Thus, my only alternative becomes playing “beat the clock” with the evolving school lunch. Rejected so far was a measly baggy of ¼ cup of cashews, sunflower seeds, and string cheese; also, my brilliant invention of an orange-frozen mango vanilla protein powder shake that takes 20 seconds to whip up in the blender and about 20 seconds to down. This would leave another 120 seconds for Sun Chips and his fruit d’jour. Boys and boosting attention? It is ON. Read to the end for the ingredients. Still, I have to bribe him with reward points like I’m the United Airlines mileage program in order to get him to drink it, and only at breakfast.

But this is where the Farmer’s Market comes in. As we compromise to avoid food as a conflict, his having a range of inviting fresh food from which to choose by taste-test has truly made him a healthy eater from way back.

When he was in preschool, he had lunches the preschool teachers eyed for themselves. One noontime, I got a call that our son forgot his lunch. “All he has is a Lunchable. We figured it HAD to be somebody else’s. He always eats so healthy.” Only for peer group reasons, because every other kid had them daily, we compromised, letting him take a Lunchable on Fridays. The deal was to camouflage a lack of candy and sugar drink by stuffing into the package carrots, all-fruit juice and his farmer’s market choice of fruit.

Now that we’re thrust into the trifecta season of excess food and junk–Halloween, Hanukkah, Christmas—I’m watching the five farmers markets around me for some back up. The yummier the free samples, the easier it is to replace junk with sweet but good stuff.

We are sure that taking our son as a toddler to the weekly farmers markets played a significant role in his healthy eating and love of almost any fruit. He is willing to try almost any variety. Most kids like apples, but sour pomegranates? Rhubarb? He will eat anything purple.

By age 3 he was dining a full-course meal at the market, from appetizer nuts to apple turnovers and Fujis at Ha’s apples, to almond butter on whole wheat bread triangles at the bakery booth. By 4, he was haggling on price, paying for things he chose, and counting the change. He would even come home and act as a waiter, cutting up fruit and serving samples.

It has many teachable moments. Your child connects with real flavor, a sensory adventure with some control over his own consumption, the economics of food, even socialization with interacting in the market setting that dates back to ancient times. We have shared that history and lore (for some reason, though, he thinks the dried fruit CAME from days of yore).

The Farmer’s Market will save you a good amount weekly for most produce, or at least give you another week of shelf life over traditional grocery store fare. Click here for a list of L.A. area farmers markets.

Also enlightening was this story about neighboring communities with economic and health disparity. One has farmers markets, the other is in poorer health. Link: http://www.healthycal.org/eating-across-a-social-divide.html

And as promised, here is my shake recipe:

SHAKE
2 scoops of Whey Protein Powder, Vanilla or Chocolate (I bought at Trader Joe’s)
4 oz. orange juice
8 to 10 bite-size pieces of fresh frozen mango but any fruit will do
A splash of milk

Blend until frothy, about 20 seconds

If you replace the juice with milk you gain more protein. Only the juice seems to recall my son’s beloved Jamba Juice smoothies.

I’d love to hear some healthy recipes you got over the plate, so please share.

Health and Nutrition

The 3-year-old with the Powerful Thump

Sep 20th, 10 / 0 Comments

by Auntie Em

For a couple of years, my peace and quiet was interrupted by our next door neighbor’s teenage son and his garage band. They practiced almost every weekend, playing everything from hip-hop to county western and jazz, until the “wannabe musicians” were silenced when the five of them left for college a year ago.

I was so thankful for the return to normal sound levels on our block.

But early last Saturday morning, I heard a steady thumping of drums. It was hard to label the sound, but it kind of sounded like a rock band drummer with a bad hangover. Thud, bang, bang, thumpity, thump, thump, thump!

Oh my God……I suddenly remembered that my husband had mentioned that Raymond, the 3 year old across the street had just gotten a drum set. How could such a little person make so much noise?

Thank goodness he didn’t live next door.

Don’t get me wrong. I definitely believe that music is an important part of children’s lives, but when I was a kid I took piano lessons and my banging on the keys was never loud enough to be heard outside.

After the shock of it all I tried to listen more objectively and decided it really wasn’t that awful. In fact, if he keeps practicing he will probably be on America’s Got Talent by 2017.

The point is, music is critical to our lives, and that love and enjoyment starts at a very young age; and enjoying music includes playing music. Plus, researchers in the field of neurology believe that musical training can play a profound role in the development of a child’s sensory system. Experts believe that playing music might help children process speech and enable them to better interpret the subtleties of language that are conveyed in the human voice.

Not sure if drums fit into that language category but they certainly help a kid get good rhythm and coordination. Plus, percussion instruments give kids a constructive——although noisy—-outlet for their energy.

The percussion family includes large, stationary instruments as well as small and portable instruments and there are toy replicas made for children.

If drums are too costly or big for your taste, you can find a variety of smaller percussion instruments that are perfect to help children learn rhythm. They can ring a hand bell in time to music or a metronome. Maracas are another popular toy for children. You might also try the triangle or a tambourine, which can be found at music stores.

A homemade instrument, such as a rain stick is another option. Use an empty paper towel tube for the body of the rain stick. Glue cardboard to one end to seal it up, then add unpopped popcorn, sand, coarse salt and small beans to the tube so it becomes a noisemaker. Seal up the other end with cardboard and decorate.

These are fun and easy to make. In fact, I plan to invite myself over to accompany Raymond with my rain stick next weekend

Parenting

Surviving the Back to School Blues

Sep 14th, 10 / 0 Comments

by Double Duty Mama

When you’re a kid, the calendar has a lot more meaning. But, once you leave school, the words “summer vacation” no longer evoke feelings of freedom and images of lazy days filled with beach visits, long afternoons playing with friends or sleeping late. Save for weekends, holidays and a few vacations each year, adults become attuned to a year-round schedule.

For more than 10 years, that’s how I operated. The seasons changed, birthdays came, and came again, and Christmas was a low-key, day off to spend with family. Kids, though, changed all that.

Never is Kid Time more different for me than September. In the summer months prior to the start of school, my family gets comfortable in the homework-free evenings where we play outside in the late light and get lackadaisical about bedtimes. When school starts in the fall, though, it’s like we’ve been hit by a wrecking ball. It takes us weeks to get into the school groove again as we mourn the loss of our free time, now spent filling in school forms, putting together disaster kits and making sure everyone is in bed on time – bathed and fed. This can seem so difficult – especially in a family, like mine, where both parents work.

The keys to a smooth transition back into the school year are organization and routine. Here are a few or my tried and true tips to surviving the Back to School Blues:

Reduce the disorganized feel that clutter inevitably brings by giving everything its own place. When the kids come home, they put their backpacks on one dining room chair where I can inspect their contents. I make a pile for homework or other forms that need immediate attention, another pile for things that need to be dealt with at some point and throw the rest away – like fliers with event dates that I record immediately in my calendar. I look at all the school work that comes home, giving it the appropriate ooohs and aaahs. I save a few great or personal pieces in an underbed storage box, and throw the rest away (when my child is sleeping, of course).

Since my first-grader does his homework at the kitchen counter, I keep nearby a basket of supplies I know he’ll need: kid scissors, pencils, sharpener, glue, crayons and markers.

Make a routine, and stick to it. Kids thrive on predictable schedules and, if you know your child needs to be in bed by 8 p.m. to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 6 a.m., then make that a priority. Accept that, sometimes, you have to cut corners (like a quick scrub down with a wash cloth some nights instead of a full bath every night).

Fall doesn’t just bring school, but all the other kid activities that require their own sets of forms and events, like sports, scouts, religious school or music and art classes. Find a calendar system that works for you, whether it’s a color-coded wall calendar, an online system you can access from home, work or your cellular telephone or a bound calendar that goes with you. Our family’s calendar is online and overlaps with mine and husband’s work calendars. This keeps us from double-booking (most the time) and ready for whatever is coming next.

I try to do as much as I can the night before to cut down on the early-morning responsibilities. My 4-year-old’s clothes are laid out for him and my 6-year-old’s lunch is packed before I go to bed.

I find that doing a quick house “re-setting” every Sunday evening helps get the school and work week off to an organized start. Before bed, everyone helps return toys that migrated to the living room floor back to their rightful spots and pitches in sorting and folding laundry.

It may seem like a race trying to fit it all in. But remember, at some point, you will get it all done. Even if it has to wait for the weekend!

Parenting

Back to (Pre) School

Sep 9th, 10 / 2 Comments

by Momanista

I often think of our first preschool, as the summer winds down. It was September when I had one of those first parent episodes where I trusted my instincts and it did not end disastrously, much to my surprise.

“Your son seems to prefer playing alone,” the preschool teacher remarked, after one month with my toddler. Inferred: This may be a bad sign.

Given that my 3-year-old was quite sociable at home — some might say chatty — I should have asked more questions, worried less. But the teacher had taught kindergarten, which gave her credibility. And so I fretted over the next few weeks, scrutinizing every playground encounter. Is he mixing? Wait, he threw down that kid’s shovel. Why is he alone under the slide with the dump truck?

My Greek chorus of friends would counter with the usual refrain: So what?

As weeks wore on, a question I’d shoved from my mind boomeranged back, and back. Who gives up public education benefits for low daycare wages?

Her answer was that she got tired of bureaucracy, which took her away from the students. Sounded good.

Six weeks in, I delivered my son’s forgotten lunch mid-morning. He laughed and ran around the yard with six others. Later that week, the teacher again mentioned that my son was playing alone, building blocks in class solo, again with the tone of “I’m just letting you know….”

So I asked my kid, and other kids, how does your day go? What games does Mrs. So-and-So play at recess?

Turned out, the teacher smoked, and didn’t play with the kids at all. Rather than outdoor time with the kids, she went “on break,” as my son put it. She thus had no idea that he was playing fine in the yard. It turned out, she’d said the same to other parents. It turned out, the class was a bit cluttered and playing alone with the blocks preserved precious breathing room for a few kids like mine.

People are human and have their days, and this family-owned center had a terrific playground built by parents, and windows galore. Still, the vibe was off, and I missed that due to its service to my need: It had an opening when we needed one. Daily at pickup, 10 ‘til 6, the secretary was sporting her handbag and standing at the door, meeting me with silent, pursed lips. You again.

By the time I’d spent 40 minutes to reach the daycare, I was frazzled and met with reproach. My friends and I would wonder: Who works only until 5 anymore? These centers don’t fit our schedules.

On a whim one lunch hour, I walked across the street from my Long Beach office to the World Trade Center, and entered a chain daycare called Childtime. A coworker had described the place two years earlier as windowless, when her son was a newborn. But it was five minutes away.

Come to find out, Childtime was floor-to-ceiling windows — the varying naptimes for snoozing infants necessitated shading just one room. The play yard was so enormous that there was a track for big trikes. More importantly, every teacher seemed happy to be there. Huge. The director was Celeste Perez, whose family is a San Pedro fixture. Teachers were bilingual. Parents hailed from a diverse range of jobs: waitresses, FBI agents, government clerks, engineers, lawyers.

My son visited. He ran open-armed into the yard of trikes. We moved him there two weeks later.

The notion had seemed so scary, but the place defied the rap on childcare chains. We felt we’d joined a family. We remain friends with those classmates today.

All this is to say: Trust your gut. As a parent, you know more than you think you know. If something seems not right over the course of a few days, or multiple times a month, your Mom radar — Mamadar? — is telling you something your brain doesn’t yet want to see.

Go with it.

Parenting, Preschool

Why Are Toddlers So Moody?

Aug 24th, 10 / 0 Comments

by Auntie Em

“Alfredo has multiple personalities,” jokes his mother. She tells me that one second he’s fine and then, if he can’t get his puzzle together gets really prickly and starts screaming.

“I don’t want to tell you what happens if I put the meat and gravy too close to his vegetables.”

So I am wondering why so much drama over a little gravy?

The majority of these ups and downs are a very normal part of growing up, and it’s important not to mistake them for misbehavior, according to a child psychiatrist.

But I don’t care what the experts say; Alfredo’s mom was frustrated by his mood swings.

And I don’t blame her! This is my favorite story: Alfredo gets in one of his moods and tells her he wants ice cream. They get on the freeway and sit in traffic for over an hour just to take Alfredo to his favorite ice cream shop. They finally get there, grab ice cream and get back in the car to go home. Once in the car, Alfredo changes his mind and dumps his cone in the back seat of the car.

We all know that some toddlers become drama queens and kings – Alfredo being one of them. But, why are they so moody and explosive at times?

Lots of reasons I’ve been told, and all of them purely developmental.

Toddlers can’t communicate their wants and needs as well as they’d like to.

Problem #1 – Lack of Vocabulary: Between the ages of 1 and 3, the world is enormous, fascinating, and ever changing. It sounds great, but most toddlers are little people with only a 20-word vocabulary, so their lives can be frustrating.

What to do: Sometimes you’re not going to be able to figure out what your child wants right away, “so stay calm and realize that the situation isn’t anyone’s fault.” “Then, try to help him by picking up items he might possibly want and labeling them.” Say the name of each item out loud and point to it.

Problem #2 – No Concept of Time: Your child may know that he’s thirsty, and may even tell you so. But when that juice box doesn’t appear immediately, watch out.

What to do: There’s a big upside to this particular toddler phenomenon. Having no concept of time means that many toddlers get sidetracked very easily. Anger over a delayed drink can quickly turn to joy over a sink full of bubbles, so always be at the ready with a distraction.

Problem #3 – Trouble Switching from One Task to the Next: “Kids get very focused on one activity and then we expect them to change gears instantly. This sort of transition takes a toll on even an adult mind, so those expectations are way too high for children.

What to do: Take advantage of your child’s burgeoning skills. Toddlers have a solid understanding of sequencing; they are well aware of how one action follows the next. Activity changeovers can be eased with warnings that come early and often.

In the bath, say, “Now we’re going to wash your hair and then rinse it. After we rinse it, we’re getting out of the bath.”

Problem #4 – getting Tired and Hungry Very Quickly: Some toddlers tucker out within three hours of awakening in the morning. And unlike older kids, toddlers don’t fuel up at meals because they tend to graze all day. You won’t be surprised to learn that tired, hungry kids are moody kids who cry on a dime.

What to do: First, try to plan your day around nap time. Don’t schedule play dates or doctor appointments during the nap zone.

And, I don’t visit Alfredo’s house unless I know he has had his nap

Parenting

Turning Reading Moments into Learning Moments

How to Make a Homemade Book

Patience, Perserverance and a Nipple Shield

Sleeping

Don’t Bite Me Lil’ Kim

Back-to-School Meals: Goodbye Lunchables, Hello Delicious!

The 3-year-old with the Powerful Thump

Surviving the Back to School Blues

Back to (Pre) School

Why Are Toddlers So Moody?

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