Archive for the ‘Preschool’ Category

Talking About “Boo Boos” and Other Changes Parents Can Expect as Children Develop

Oct 13th, 11 / 0 Comments

Note: This entry originally ran on the Best Start website as part of our Ready to Learn campaign.

Much has been written about children’s development and the ages they should be acquiring certain skills and abilities. But what happens to parents when their kids hit these milestones? How are they affected?

First 5 LA’s Ready. Set. Grow! Family Guide Ready to Learn summer issue covered behaviors a child will show on the path to kindergarten. Best Start decided to take an unscientific look at what parents might expect when their child hits age-appropriate targets for behavior.

Age 1: Child knows name; becomes familiar with books and being read to; understands simple questions and facial expressions; says first word.
Parents make it their mission to get their child to repeat his or her first word with family and friends. They also make strange facial expressions and sounds to get a reaction from their child.

Age 2: Child answers simple questions; scribbles with crayons; enjoys being read to; communicates simple needs, like hunger, pain and thirst.
Parents re-discover their love for crayons and old Dr. Seuss books. They speak “baby talk” and words like “boo boo” and “owie” enter their everyday vocabulary.

Age 3: Child knows full name, age, and gender; understands and follows directions; can dress alone; eats independently; uses words to express emotion.
Parents understand what their child is saying, but no one else can. High chairs and floors need a scrub down following mealtimes.

Age 4: Child “reads” favorite books by memory; is aware that letters make sounds; shares and takes turns.
Parents grow tired of reading the same children’s book again and again. They talk to their kids about the importance of sharing, but can’t explain why they don’t want to lend their car to a neighbor.

Age 5: Child writes own name; listens without interrupting; recognizes several letters and numbers 1 through 10.
Parents realize their “babies” are growing up quickly, become nervous at the thought of kindergarten, and wonder, “Where did the time go?”

Just as every child develops at his or her own pace, parents will also react differently to these milestones. The key for parents is to relax — and enjoy the ride.

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Parenting, Preschool, Reading

Keeping Little Problems From Becoming Big Ones in Pre-K

Oct 5th, 11 / 0 Comments
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By Positive Momma

For a minute there, I was one of THOSE parents. You know — the mom who believes that her child can do no wrong and that if there is a problem, it has to be the teacher’s fault.

Last week was my oldest daughter’s second week of pre-k. And though she attended the school’s summer program, she suddenly decided she did not like, nor did she want to go to, school. In fact, she’d cry every morning. Miserably. And every morning, I’d head off to work, trying not to cry myself, with my daughter’s tears and runny nose remnants on my clothes.

By day three, my husband and I had had it. We were convinced that her teacher must be the problem, and it was reinforced when my daughter cried, “Ms. X was mean to me. She yelled at me!” Yell? At my daughter? Who would yell at my sweet little angel? Yes, I’ve yelled at her, but that’s not the point!

Thursday, I was finally able to speak with the teacher. Turns out, my daughter was upset that her teacher did not choose her as the class helper that week (she was the helper the prior week). When she found out my daughter had been crying every morning (because I told every teacher there), she began trying different tactics to encourage her, like giving her helper assignments.

I began to realize it was the transition to the pre-k environment and coursework, not the teacher, that was the problem. I began to employ the greatest weapon I know in helping my child: TIME. When we got home, instead of starting homework right away, I’d have some play time with my two daughters together to give the older one a chance to decompress from an entire day of structure. The result? Happier mom, happier daughter, greater bonding between sisters and my daughter now enjoys school.

Lessons learned?

1. It’s okay to be “that parent.” You are your child’s first advocate — just be sure to temper it with reason and understanding the facts before jumping to conclusions.

2. Connect with your child’s teacher if you have a concern. Ask questions and don’t underestimate the teachers’ understanding of your child as an individual.

3. Time heals all wounds. Play time, talk time, cuddle time, encouragement time — it’s all good time to spend with your child.

 

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Behavior Issues, Parenting, Preschool

The Day Preschool Arrived

Sep 7th, 11 / 1 Comment
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By Mama Love

Last week, when I dropped off two (of our three) children for first and third grade, I was upbeat, talkative and positive to calm any anxiety that the kids might have had. At school they unbuckled, grabbed their backpacks and were escorted out of the car by teacher’s aides shuffling children past the gates to avoid traffic delays. As the aide slammed my car door, I went on my way and, before I could make it out of the parking lot, I broke down in full-blown tears!

Tomorrow I will muster up the courage to do it again, but this time with my pre-kinder 4-year-old. She and I will both attend her orientation and, the next day, she will begin her first day of preschool. These milestones can often be difficult for the child, the parent or both. Here are some recommendations to help ease the anxiety from our little ones:

  • Repeat the Schedule: By repeating exactly what will take place at school, you will help your child begin to imagine what he will be doing and he will feel more prepared mentally. Role playing can also help.
  • Use the Teacher’s Name: Have your child practice saying her new teacher’s name and repeat it so she feel more connected to him or her on the first day.
  • Stay Upbeat: Being positive with any new experience can help ease a child’s anxiety – if he sees you’re comfortable with it, chances are he will be, too.
  • Have Siblings Chime In: If there are older children in your household, have them talk to your younger child about going to school and all the positive things she will be experiencing.
  • Set Clothes Out: Have your child pick out her favorite outfit and shoes and set it out near her bed.
  • Bathe the Night Before: Bathing your child the night before the big day gives you a chance to talk to him about his first day of school while they are in a safe, comfortable and fun atmosphere.
  • Reassurance: Calm the child’s nerves by reassuring her that mommy (or daddy) will be back to pick her up. Be sure to arrive when you say you will.
  • Let Them Go: As parents and nurturers, our instinct is to stay and comfort our child — but it’s easier on the child if you leave quick rather than linger (easier said than done). Children usually stop crying or are fine just minutes after the parent leaves.

Before our first child went to pre-kinder, there was a video that we watched months in advance to help him  feel safe, secure and to let him know that someone would be coming back for him. We still sing (and know) the song today.

The song is called “Mommy Comes Back” by Hap Palmer and sung by Martha Cheney and Hap Palmer. Below are the lyrics and a link to the video:

My Mommy Comes Back

Sometimes my mommy takes me over
To another friends house to play
Sometimes I only stay a little while
Sometimes I stay all day, but

Chorus:

My mommy comes back
She always comes back
She always comes back to get me
My mommy comes back
She always comes back
She never would forget me

Sometimes I worry when she leaves me
I hope she won’t be gone too long
But when I’m with my friends and havin’ fun
I soon forget she’s gone, and…

Repeat Chorus

Sometimes I visit with my grandma
While my mommy goes somewhere
We bake some cookies and we read a book
And rock in the rocking chair, and

Repeat Chorus

To all the parents during this stressful, beginning-of-school-time: know that you are not alone, it gets easier and your children will do just fine. This is what parenting is all about. Good luck!

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Parenting, Preschool

Get Ready to Learn!

Sep 1st, 11 / 1 Comment
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By Ready. Set. Grow!

Your kids may not be starting kindergarten, or even preschool, this fall … but it’s never too early to start them on the path to school success!

Be sure to check out our Family Guide for ideas on how to get your baby, toddler or preschooler ready to learn. You may be surprised to learn how your 1-year-old’s crying when someone else is upset or your 4-year-old’s hopping on one foot are just some of the milestones they reach as they prepare for kindergarten.

The Family Guide also has information about the new age cut-off laws in California and transitional kindergarten, tips on choosing a quality preschool and some truths and myths about vaccinations.

If you’ve kids getting ready for school, First 5 LA and Best Start will be all around Los Angeles County in the next few weeks, helping you get your kids ready to learn with free school supplies and resources. Visit the First 5 LA calendar (and keep looking for updates!) to find an event near you.

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Behavior Issues, Parenting, Preschool, Reading

Are You Packing Disease-Causing Bacteria In Your Kids’ Lunch Box? I Was.

Aug 18th, 11 / 1 Comment
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By Double Duty Mama

For the last two years, I’ve packed a lunch for my older son every day. With my youngest son about to start kindergarten, I will be doubling that daily chore. As if it’s not hard enough deciding if I’m packing too little (or too much) and if the meal is nutritious and well-balanced, now I also have to worry about filling their lunch boxes with potentially tummy-ache causing food, too.

Honestly, I’ve never given much thought to the temperature of their food. They get sandwiches, fruit and vegetables, chips and granola bars, as well as items like cheese and yogurt (and, of course, water to drink). I figured: “Eh. They’re boys. They don’t care if their food is warm. They eat anything.”

Man, was I wrong!

A study released last week found that 98 percent of perishable food in preschoolers’ sack lunches reached unsafe temperatures even before lunchtime. Researchers at the University of Texas examined 700 lunches packed for 3 to 5 year olds attending child care centers and found that the food was not packed to stay cold (or hot) enough to prevent bacteria from growing.

Even with multiple ice packs, most of the perishable foods had reached an unsafe temperature.

The study, which will be published in September’s Pediatrics, called foodborne illness a “major public threat” in the U.S., adding that it has a “significant impact on the well-being of young children.” Symptoms can range from the mild, like upset stomachs and diarrhea, to severe, like kidney problems, malnutrition and death — especially in young children whose immune systems are not fully developed.

The study’s authors admit it’s difficult to keep food packed in lunch sacks at safe temperatures. However, the USDA has some tips that can help keep us from packing a side of disease with our kids’ peanut butter and jelly sandwiches:

  • Keep perishable food, like raw or cooked meat and poultry and eggs, cold or frozen at home.
  • Wash your hands with soap and warm water for 20 seconds before preparing or eating food.
  • Wash cutting boards, dishes, utensils and countertops with hot, soapy water after preparing each food item and moving on to the next. (Double Duty Mama hint: I keep an anti-bacterial disinfectant spray handy in the kitchen for easy clean-up.)
  • Don’t re-use disposable food packages, like zip sandwich bags.
  • Pack just the amount of perishable foods in lunch boxes that will be eaten at lunchtime. Tell your kids to throw away any perishable food they don’t eat.
  • It’s OK to prepare lunch the night before and store the packed lunch in the refrigerator. Freezing sandwiches helps them stay cold, but, if you do, add mayonnaise, lettuce and tomatoes later.
  • Insulated, soft-sided lunch boxes or bags are best for keeping food cold. If you use paper lunch bags, use two to help insulate the food.
  • An ice source should be packed with perishable food in any lunch sack. This could be a frozen gel pack or frozen drink container.
  • Keep perishable food cold until the last minute before leaving the house.

This study scared me enough to do some things differently. I’m going to freeze my kids’ water bottles and sandwiches overnight, and buy some ice packs or gels.

What do you think of this study? Do you have any hints to share?

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Health and Nutrition, Preschool

NPR Beginnings: Child Care Costs

Aug 9th, 11 / 0 Comments
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By Double Duty Mama

When my first son was born a little more than seven years ago, I worked at a newspaper. If you know anything about newspapers, then you know they’re in trouble and don’t pay their employees very well. I loved my job, though, and knew I would not be happy as a stay-at-home mom. There was never a question in my mind that I’d go back to work outside the home and my son would go to some kind of child care setting.

As I’ve written about here before, choosing someone to watch your child is a difficult decision. However, on top of safety, health, nutrition and developmentally-appropriate activities as things to consider when choosing child care, there is one that no one likes to talk about, but everything thinks about a lot: cost.

This month, National Public Radio is running an amazingly informative and insightful series called Beginnings: Pregnancy, Childbirth and Beyond. It explores everything from global health to business and economy to culture and tradition as it pertains to pregnancy, birth, babies and children.

Yesterday, NPR aired a discussion about child care among six parents and one grandparent who live in Washington D.C. They all agreed that child care providers don’t get paid enough for their very important and difficult jobs — yet they were all paying too much. One father estimated he paid $10,000 a year to send his daughter to preschool and a lawyer turned stay-at-home mother said it was more cost-effective to quit her job than send her two young girls to day care.

The second part of the discussion is scheduled to air this afternoon. But, like all the stories in the series, they can all be streamed or downloaded from the NPR website. I highly recommend them.

 

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Budgeting, Parenting, Preschool

“Redshirting” Kindergartners Raises Lots of Questions

Aug 2nd, 11 / 0 Comments
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By Ready. Set. Grow!

Unfortunately, there still seems to be a lot of confusion – among parents and educators alike – about transitional kindergarten. The Kindergarten Readiness Act of 2010, passed by state legislators, establishes transitional kindergarten for children who won’t be 5 years old when the school year starts. (You can read more about the law in a First 5 LA Monday Morning Report article here or in the new Ready. Set. Grow! Ready to Learn Family Guide here.)

This week, the Los Angeles Times highlights disagreements about the benefits and drawbacks of transitional kindergarten, noting how even research conflicts:

“Research has shown benefits and drawbacks to holding back children. A 2006 study published in the Economics of Education Review looked at the age at which children started kindergarten and their test scores in reading and math during the first two years of school. The study found that children who entered kindergarten later had significantly better scores in those two subjects, and the advantage increased slightly by the time they were done with first grade.

“But another study documented some of the difficulties encountered by children who are older than their classmates. The 1997 report, published in the journal Pediatrics, focused on more than 9,000 students ages 7 to 17. Researchers discovered that those who entered school later were more likely to have behavioral problems.”

Our own Double Duty Mama struggled with this decision like the parents in the Los Angeles Time article. You can read about the process her family went through and their ultimate decision about whether or not to “redshirt” her son in her blog entries Transitional Kindergarten and Tough Choices and Transitional Kindergarten II: Sometimes, You’ve Just Gotta Trust Your Gut.

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Behavior Issues, Parenting, Preschool, Reading

Is Your Toddler a Bully?

Jun 22nd, 11 / 0 Comments
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By Double Duty Mama

There was a time where I struggled with labels for my son’s behavior. As I previously wrote about here, he was acting like a 2-year-old jerk for a while there. Of course, I knew he didn’t have the capability to be mean on purpose, but I wanted to somehow explain and understand his biting and hitting. My goal in all of this was to find the “cure,” because I worried that he really was just a bully … and once a bully, always a bully.

But do toddlers and preschoolers really have the ability to be bullies? According to the dictionary, a bully is basically someone who intentionally picks fights with smaller or weaker people. In an article today on the TODAY Moms website, both experts and non-expert parents disagree whether young children have the planning abilities and complex thought it takes to be a bully.

My kid is now 4-years-old and I know now that he is not a bully. Sometimes, it’s hard to even remember that this sweet, loving and sharing boy was once aggressive and violent with his playmates.

What do you think? Are there 3- and 4-year-old bullies?

 

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Behavior Issues, Parenting, Preschool

Transitional Kindergarten Part II: Sometimes, You’ve Just Gotta Trust Your Gut

May 31st, 11 / 0 Comments
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The envelope from the school district arrived and I put it aside so my husband and I could open it together. It was silly to be so nervous, really, considering we had already decided that, no matter what district officials recommend, we were not going to put our youngest son in developmental kindergarten.

After having him evaluated, I had an unplanned — yet revealing — conversation with one of his preschool teachers. When I said we were still thinking about developmental kindergarten, she kind of wrinkled her nose.

The program, she said, is great for kids who need some extra time or attention or who are not used to the school environment. My kid, she assured, was doing really well on his schoolwork and was a good student and friend to his classmates. He is excited to learn, is becoming a leader, follows classroom behavior rules and understands how to act in a group. She thought he would be bored, if not next year, then the following year, if he went to developmental kindergarten.

His preschool teacher has a lot of experience and has taught a lot of 4-year-olds. She knows our son really well and, frankly, I trust her and her judgment. But were were still uncertain.

Then, about a week later, we attended the school’s “Kindergarten Round-up.” I didn’t know what would happen at the event, but it turned out the kindergarten teachers were taking the soon-to-be kinder students to the classroom for stories and songs while the parents did a Q&A with parents of current kindergarten students. “Here it goes…” I thought, thinking how my kid will freak out at the idea of being separated from me and going off with strangers. I envisioned tears and leg clinging.

We walked as a group, which included a couple kids from his district-run preschool class. When the time came to go our separate ways, my kid turned to one of his friends and said: “Sean, you’re coming with me.”

He said, “Bye, Mama,” took a teacher’s hand and walked away.

Just. Like. That. No problem, whatsoever.

That pretty much sealed it

So, now, like with every big decision we make for our kids, we are going to move forward and not dwell on our choice. Transitional kindergarten looks like a great opportunity for a lot of kids. It’s just not for us.

To learn more about transitional kindergarten, including a new California law that will make it mandatory for children born between Sept. 1 and Dec. 1, visit The Transitional Kindergarten Library.

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Behavior Issues, Parenting, Preschool

Transitional Kindergarten and Tough Choices

Apr 19th, 11 / 3 Comments
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As I’ve mentioned before, we’ve had some behavioral issues with my younger son. What I haven’t mentioned is that, despite our challenges, he is turning out to be quite an avid little learner.

 

In the last six months or so, he’s made huge strides in writing and coloring. He’s always been interested in books, but now shows he understands what we’re reading by asking questions and pointing out things he hears and sees. He’s known his letters and numbers for a while, but now likes to rhyme words, asks what letters words start with and is figuring out that numbers can help him do math.

 

He’s supposed to start kindergarten in the fall, and we’ve always accepted that he’d be one of the “younger” kindergartners with an August birthday AND his aforementioned behavior problems. But, when I went to register him for school, the clerk noticed his birthday and mentioned that we might want to have him assessed for developmental kindergarten.

 

I’d only learned about developmental kindergarten a couple years ago from a fellow mother who told me her kids were going to “Preppy K,” one of the various names for this extra year of schooling.

 

For many kids, developmental kindergarten is a wonderful opportunity to grow, mature and learn in a setting that’s just right. They tend to be more structured and academic than preschool, yet not as rigorous and fast-paced as a traditional kindergarten class. Last year, a new state law was passed that requires that students starting kindergarten be 5 years old by Sept. 1, instead of the current cut-off date of Dec. 2. Lauded by educators, the bill also ensures that the kids who qualify receive a year of transitional kindergarten from their school district.

 

For weeks now, my husband and I have debated the developmental kindergarten issue. We decided it was worth it to have him assessed, but it’s up to us to make the final decision. We’ve talked about it with his teachers and his psychiatrist, all of whom didn’t seem very enthusiastic and expressed concern that he would be bored come kindergarten the following year, which could then lead to a whole different set of behavioral problems.

 

Of course, given that he’s 4, when the time came to meet with the developmental kindergarten teacher for his assessment, he went into shy mode. He shut down and barely spoke to her. We scheduled another assessment for the following week. This time, probably because he knew what to expect, he went with the teacher on his own and participated.

 

Most of me wants him to just get on with the whole school thing already. But I’m also trying to think about it in terms of where he’ll be years from now. He’ll always be one of the younger kids, which we realize could impact his self-esteem and school performance. However, we know him pretty well, and can see that he’s more a leader than a follower, is eager to learn, and can hold his own with his older brother and his friends.

 

I recently came across an article on the Scholastic website about kindergarten readiness. It said kindergarten teachers were mostly looking for students who are enthusiastic about learning, have good language skills and the ability to listen. They should be able to play well with others, but also independently.

 

So now we’re waiting for the recommendation before making any big decisions — you know, the kind that can impact a child for the rest of his life. No pressure or anything.

 

Stay tuned…

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Behavior Issues, Parenting, Preschool